My day consisted of lying in bed, sleeping. I am happy that I was actually able to sleep. I woke up this morning and started to give my blood back. When my tubes were clear, I began to disconnect myself from the machine…but I didn’t feel well. I thought perhaps I had miscalculated and taken off too much fluid. I looked at the numbers I had entered into my machine as well as my dialysis logs. They both looked fine. While still connected to my machine, I stood on my nearby scale. My weight was perfectly fine and I hadn’t dried myself out. I resumed disconnecting myself and pulling my needles.
I didn’t feel well. It had nothing to do with being too dry. My stomach hurt. My body hurt. I felt exhausted. After clotting my arm off, I got up, brushed my teeth and washed my face, exactly as I would on any Saturday morning. I tried to force it. No matter how often up Lupies try to force ourselves to do something, it’s important to realize that if Lupus isn’t having it…trust me. Lupus is NOT having it. My body was weak, my stomach felt crampy. I had to listen to myself. No work for me today.
I often do NOT listen to my body. I think if I did, I’d never go anywhere. But sometimes, you just have to listen to your body. I had everything all planned for today. I was going to go to work during the day and be home by 4:30. I was going to study for a few hours as I have two tests next week, then leave my house at around 6:50pm. Today is my friend’s birthday, and we were all invited out for dinner. It was a really cool looking restaurant – lots of healthy, organic food.
We make plans.